poem from 2006

Recurring Themes (by NKP)

Recurring themes that I’ve noticed:

O this and O that and
the other
dishes cracked, often by the moon

self-righteousness, Paris
introspection, romance
kisses red and wine linen white and snow

nouns as adjectives, as in
roofed suffocation, or poster joy
perhaps –

when in doubt –
a – that or a –this—
punctuation can fill
in many gaps n

knowledge of letters
of the alphabet or
the lost in love or
resignation

of the soul

Article from NY Times about grad school

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/24/education/edlife/edl-24masters-t.html

"The Physics of Culture"--Kevin Slavin

I think I wrote this about 3 years ago...just found in 'drafts'

Not to put too fine a point on it, but...

There is nothing better than the absence of pain...both physically, and emotionally. For some reason, I feel just fantastic. To the point that it's a little disconcerting...I'm refraining from worrying..the usual worries that strangle me are still coming at me, but I'm able to just bat (think of better word) them away with a chuckle when they usually riddle me with doubt, fear, insecurity, etc. What's different today? I'm trying not to get caught up in...how should I best use this energy? that thought actually crossed my mind: how silly. 'should I wash the dishes and be productive? Should I write and be creative? Should I take a fabulous nap and be lazy? for now, I'm just going to write (ride...haha) this out. I don't even care that I'm missing out on drinks right now (too much.)

Now, about blogs and the web: I feel a little uncomfortable...voyeuristic and intrusive...I don't know if it's everyone's temptation, but it's certainly mine...to look up anyone who's ever mattered to me to look for golden nuggets of their lives. Well when I find a blog where maybe they wrote their innermost thoughts or about who they see or what they're doing,. I am interested. In this age, you can learn so much about someone..Well, how does that work ethically? If someone isn't willing to share something, should they have to share it unwillingly? Then again, people realize that that's the nature of the beast that we call the web...people are aware when they post things online that theoretically, anyone could read what they write. I think what gets people to post their thoughts anyway is the assumption that 'oh, who's gonna read THIS...from little ole me...no one cares.' And to a large extent, that's true. BUT...for that inner circle of people that you have touched over the years, they may care a lot and learn stuff about you that you might not be comfortable with. THEN AGAIN...maybe people are more like me than I realize, as is often the case, and although they don't want to admit it, deep down, they desperately WANT to be 'found out.' They want that secret someone to know how they feel...they want the people that they're so intimidated by face-to-face that they really are a very passionate, witty, intelligent, sensual person. If ONLY they would read this! who knows...probably not.
It feels so good to write, but I just wish that I wrote more creatively. I want to tap into people's innermost selves...touch a part of them that they didn't know existed. That's enough of a reason to write, right? Right???


I wish I could pinpoint these partially-formed thoughts that have been tormenting lately--both in a good way and a bad way. Meeting someone who at some point you realize is a lot like you is misery. If there's anything standing in the way of being with this person--close friend, lover, whatever, it's torture. (and there usually seems to be something standing in the way) You witness things about them that make you want to scream, to just jump on them like an eager puppy when you see them, and you can't see them soon enough, and never for long enough. The moments spent with them fly by in a frenzy of nervousness, anxiousness, excitement, fear, ecstasy, for starters. And they have no idea you feel this way, and probably have no idea that they resonate with you. Being the emotional exhibitionist that I am, I want desperately to tell them...LOOK! I'm just like you! Shouldn't we be unencumbered in our togetherness?! It's a shame when someone like that slips away without knowing them like you want to and even need to. sitting on this information tears you up inside...do they feel it too? My mom always says that things don't happen in a vacuum--if you feel it, they probably feel it too. But over time, I've realized that my family's optimism is sometimes a detriment because I believe it. My friends lately have been pointing out that my idealism and subsequent disappointment in reality is quite adolescent. But I'd rather be disappointed than lower my standards.

By next fall...

Graduate School Application Planning

* Take Practice GRE (July)
* Pick Concentration (July):
* Pick 5-12 Potential Schools & Faculty (July)
o School Websites
o Division Websites (http://www.scra27.org/resources/educationc/academicpr)
o Other Faculty
o Books & Online Guides
o Recent Literature
o Grants (http://projectreporter.nih.gov/reporter.cfm)
* Research Due Dates and Requirements (July)
* Make Timeline (5 months before 1st deadline)
* Make Spreadsheet of Schools (5 months before 1st deadline)
o University
o Program
o School/Dept Code
o Address
o Degree
o Deadline
o % of Applicants Admitted
o Average General GRE Scores
o Average Subject GRE Scores
o Average GPA
o Program Contact
o Faculty
o Website
o Letter of Recommendation Procedures
o Minimum & Maximum # of Letters
o Names of Letter Writers
o Recommendation Forms Required
o Recommendations Submitted
o Writing Sample Required
o Interview Date
o Application Fee
o Separate Financial Aid Application
o Personal Statement Specifications
o 3-5 Most Important Resources that Make Program/Dept/Faculty a Perfect Match Given Your Career, Research & Intellectual Goals, Needs & Interests
* Schedule GRE(s) (5 months before 1st deadline)
* Contact Potential Faculty & Students (4 months before 1st deadline)
* Visit Potential Graduate Programs and/or Faculty (4 months before 1st deadline)
* 2 Months of GRE Preparation (3 months before 1st deadline)
* Take General GRE (3 months before 1st deadline)
* Take Subject GRE (2 months before 1st deadline)
* Request Letters of Recommendation (2 months before 1st deadline)
* Personal Statements R1 (2 months before 1st deadline)
* Personal Statements R2 (1 month before 1st deadline)
* Personal Statements R3 (3 weeks before 1st deadline)
* Complete Application, Fellowship, Scholarship Forms (1 month before 1st deadline)
* Request Transcripts (1 month before 1st deadline)
* Reminder for Letters of Recommendation (1 month before 1st deadline)
* Proofread Application Materials Carefully (2 weeks before deadline)
* Submit Application Materials (2 weeks before deadline)
* Verify Application Receipt (1 week before deadline)
* Celebrate!
* Interview Prep (January)
* Interviews (January & February)
* Celebrate! and Personal Care
* Graduate School Notifications (March)
* Program Selection (April 15th)
* Thank You’s
* Celebrate!




Suggested Resources

* Applying to Graduate School: Tips, Timeline, and Tools of the Trade
o http://www.cic.net/libraries/diversity/gradschoolguide.sflb
* Free GRE Practice Test
o http://www.princetonreview.com/grad/free-gre-practice-test.aspx
* Free ETS GRE Preparation Materials
o http://www.ets.org/gre/general/prepare
* Eye on Psi Chi Graduation Application Articles
o http://www.psichi.org/pubs/search.aspx?category1=7
* APS Article on Applying to Graduate School
o http://www.psychologicalscience.org/observer/getArticle.cfm?id=1455
* Graduate School Interview Tips
o http://www.salisbury.edu/careerservices/students/GraduateSchool/Interviews.html
* APS Article on Interviewing
o http://www.psychologicalscience.org/observer/getArticle.cfm?id=2184
* Sample Interview Questions
o http://career.boisestate.edu/files/2010/12/Practice-Interview-Questions-Graduate-Programs.pdf
* Other Graduate Application Links
o http://www.columbia.edu/cu/psychology/dept/resources/getin3.html

SHOES!!!!

http://www.lorisshoes.com/department.asp?lt=d&deptid=9383&pindex=all

LUCKILY, the ones I'd be tempted to get are either in monster sizes or are sold out. Phew. Still, I feel a little weak...