When It Goes Wrong...

I have one hour to think on this:
When interpersonal relationships (friend, chatting, more, etc) don't go well, what am I contributing? i.e. what do I do wrong when talking to someone? (that's my interpretation of the question)

I would say:
1. I'm anxious, and that comes through and makes the other person anxious.
2. I'm a little too clingy/needy. I don't want to admit that, but I think it might be true. I have too much to lose because I really do want more friends, and I really am always looking for someone with whom I can really connect because that is so rare (so when I find someone with whom I connect, I am all my worst qualities probably because I'm all ZOMG!!)
3. Fear. I know what I do wrong (do I ?), and so I'm worried about how I'll come across; that could be a self-fulfilling prophecy.
4. I'm too worried about what the other person is thinking/how I'm coming across/and controlling the situation (if the other person looks uncomfortable or bored, I BETTER ADDRESS IT. THAT'LL WORK?! rather than just letting things be...that's really hard for me because I'm scared people will reject me.)
5. Expecting the worst.
6. Overly self-conscious.

P.S. I should note that all of this stuff is positively correlated with how much I dig someone. People that I don't really care about probably get the coolest most collected me (but also the most aloof and bitchy, or just boring-seeming). If someone is the bee's knees they get the me that is needy and self-conscious and controlling and all those lovely traits. What's not to love? I mean really..?!
STARFISH LOVES YOU!!! (I love that part from Charlie the Unicorn or whatever that stupid video is)