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Monday, April 9, 2012

journal entries 1998 (second book)

Beginnings: a move, a dream, a loss, a thought, conversation.

Characters:
1. a guy--inspired, excited about ideas, quirky, intellectual, analytical, stoic.
2. a girl. needing change, obsesses, pipe dreamer, has difficulty taking action. Bitter due to discrepancy of reality and what she wants.

My best friend of ten years just faxed me a letter at work renouncing me as his friend. This is typical of his personality, or lack thereof, desperately trying to be self-righteous and melodramatic, but instead, coming out in the tackiest of ways, born out of the womb of a beige machine, the product smeared with ink, unintelligible. I read it..all the way from 'Dear Chenoa, I'm really pissed at you' through 'I'm sorry for your Mom about her cancer, but I'm NOT sorry for you!'
I have my twenty minutes of inappropriate-in-a-workplace-setting sobbing, and then the migraine that relocated to my right shoulder seven torturous days ago gently lifts. It's like in a movie with a Meg Ryan-type of character goes ballistic and runs to her cheating husband's office and slams everything with a sledgehammer, screams for ten minutes on the walk home at a blind stranger in the street who accidentally bumps her with his cane, then eats two chocolate cakes. Now she thinks clearly, letting out a deep sigh of relief, uttering a "huh." She washes off the symbolically messy chocolate fork, forgetting the now ex-husband, and never looks back. I was done.

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